Recovery gummies · 15 single-serve sachets
MORON HERO
Complete the pairAdd MORON FOCUS — the morning half of the same problem+$20$29Save $9See the full labelThe actives that do the real work: clear the acetaldehyde, back the liver, and put back what a night out drains. Eight of them, one sachet, every milligram printed on the label. Pocket one on the way out.
The whole argument
Eight actives. Every mg printed.
The best-selling recovery gummy runs five actives and won't tell you the purity of the one that matters. We run eight, print every milligram, and publish the lab report that checks them. Same sachet, same night — more of the label filled in.
MORON HERO
8 actives, all printed
Typical "recovery" gummy
5 actives, purity unstated
Hidden in a blend
unknowable
Supplement facts
The whole label, on the page.
You shouldn't have to squint at a pouch in a shop to find out what you're buying. Here it is, in full, before you spend anything.
Supplement Facts
Serving: 1 sachet (2 gummies)
DHM (Dihydromyricetin)
300mg — the dose the studied products use
Milk Thistle Extract
100mg — carried in coconut MCT, so it absorbs
Magnesium
20mg — as citrate, for a diuretic night
Zinc
6mg — as citrate, replacing what alcohol strips
Vitamin B1 (Thiamine)
50mg — alcohol depletes it, so we put it back
B6 · B12 · Folate
2mg · 500mcg · 400mcg — B6 kept low on purpose
Added sugar
7g — it's a gummy. We'd rather print it.
"Proprietary blend"
none. we don't do those.
Other ingredients: pectin, maltitol, allulose, water, citric acid, natural flavour, organic fruit juice (colour). No melatonin, no proprietary blends.
Every active, explained
Six actives. Every one explained.
No blends, no "proprietary" anything. Here is every active ingredient, the dose, and why it earns its place.
DHM (Dihydromyricetin)
300mg
From the Japanese raisin tree, used for exactly this purpose for centuries longer than the supplement industry has existed. 300mg is the dose the studied products use. Worth saying plainly: most of the evidence is animal work and the human research is thin. We dose where the research points and we won't dress that up as proof.
Magnesium
20mg
Alcohol is a diuretic, so you lose magnesium along with the water — and it's tied to the headache and that wrung-out feeling. As citrate, which absorbs well and doesn't need half the gummy to deliver.
Added sugar
7g
It's a gummy, so it's made of sugar — 7g of it, 35 calories a sachet. Nobody in this category puts that on their website. We'd rather you knew before you bought thirty of them than found out from the back of the box.
Milk Thistle Extract
100mg
Your liver does the actual work. Silymarin, the part that matters, barely dissolves in water — so ours sits in coconut MCT and lecithin. That's the difference between a number on a label and something your body can actually pick up.
Zinc
6mg
Alcohol strips zinc, which your body uses for dozens of jobs — including clearing the alcohol itself. As citrate, well absorbed, replacing what the night takes.
B1 · B6 · B12 · Folate
All four
Alcohol burns through B vitamins and you feel it as fog. 50mg of B1 — thiamine, the one drinking genuinely depletes. Folate at 400mcg, methylated. B12 at 500mcg. And B6 at just 2mg, on purpose: too much of it over time damages nerves, and Europe's ceiling is 12mg a day. Three big numbers and one deliberately small one.
Step 01
Rip one open, before bed
After the last drink, not the first. One sachet is one full serving — two gummies, and that's where all eight actives come from. No counting, no measuring.
Before you go out works too — take it around the drinking, or right before bed
Step 02
Drink a glass of water
There are no electrolytes in here. You'd need around 500mg of sodium for that to mean anything, which is more salt than fits in a gummy — so anyone selling you 150mg is selling you the word, not the mineral. Water is the other half of the job. It's free, it's already in your kitchen, and it genuinely works.
Step 03
Wake up a person
That's the whole routine. No powder to mix, no 6am alarm for a second dose, no morning stack sold separately.
Honest about what this is.
What it is
Eight actives, taken as one sachet before bed. It takes the edge off the hangover, backs your liver, and replaces some of what a night out drains. Every dose printed on the front, including the sugar and the one vitamin we kept deliberately small.
What it isn't
A hangover cure. Permission to go harder. A reason to skip the water. If a brand promises you'll wake up brand new, check whether they printed their doses — they almost never have.
Questions
Questions? Answered.
MORON
.
health
Health, made stupidly simple. Full doses, plain words, lab results attached.
These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Not a hangover cure — just the stuff a night out drains, put back.
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